Saturday, November 12, 2011

And Around And Around And Around We Go

It seems as though my mind never rests.   The same thoughts keep churning around and around like
a nightmare version of an amusement park carousel ride that never ends.

I can occasionally escape from these torturous thoughts by listening to a book while I knit.

The soothing voice of the novel's narrator, counting my stitches and the rhythmic click, click, clicking of my knitting needles do provide me with a few significant distractions.

Lately, it takes more energy than I seem to have, to find the time to just sit, listen and knit.  To keep my sanity, I know I should make the time, but I am so, so tired.

Last Thursday, Ross' sister Joan suffered a heart attack. She is the only sibling Ross has left.
She had a quadruple bi-pass on Tuesday.  Amazingly, though, she was up and walking two days after the operation.

One of the things that I have to make a decision about is when Ross and I can make the 8 hour trip to visit his sister.

Of course we want to see her.   But then of course I want to be here, just in case Joe or Anne need me.

How can we be in two places at the same time?

But at this point, it is not a matter of if we will go, but when we can go.

Some day when our lives have quieted down a little, I will probably reflect back on these trying times and wonder where we found the strength to be able to get through it all.

Today we went to the park with my family.   I have to admit, my mind was quiet as I got caught up in the moment of watching the grandchildren at play.  Perhaps that is where we find the strength.

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