Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Perhaps Disney Next Year

     My daughter held a position in the Human Resources department of a large corporation for ten years.  She was laid off two years ago.  During the time she collected her unemployment benefits she completed the necessary requirements to get her teaching certificate.   She turned the loss of her job into an opportunity to pursue a career in a field that she has always wanted to be in - Elementary Education.
     In January her unemployment benefits ran out.   Currently she is teaching part time, working for a well known tutoring company.  She is making a little more than minimum wage and is not given very many hours.  She looks at this in a positive light, though, considering the position to be one in which she can gain teaching experience.
      Due to budgetary restrictions, teaching positions in New Jersey are not readily available.  She has applied for and been approved to substitute teach in all of the surrounding communities in her area.
      She and her husband have two young children.  Bella is in 2nd grade, and Ryan is 4 and in daycare three days a week.  So the hours she can work is based on the hours that are available at Bella's Before Care program and Ryan's day care.
     I do worry that the longer my daughter is out of a job, the harder the family's financial situation will become.   In these hard economic times, in most households, both parents have to work.
     I was able to be a stay at home mom for a few years before I went back to work.  When I returned to work, the stress level was so much more heightened.   I remember always feeling tired.  Weekends were a blur because they were spent trying to do all of the things we couldn't get to during the week.   Looking back on those years, I realize just how precious of a commodity time was.  There never seemed to be enough.
     There were times when I "had" to send a sick child to school because I just couldn't miss that important meeting.  How I regret those decisions.  I realize now that having a TV in every room or making sure that the kids had the hottest brand of sneakers is meaningless.
     I know that that not having that second income weighs heavily on my daughter and son-in-law.  I know that the longer they are without that necessary second income, the more critical their situation may become.
     And I hope that things will turn around for them soon.
     Life is so much harder for young families these days.  It really is.
    But, today I thought about the gift my daughter has been given.  She has been given the gift of time. I don't think she would have gotten to know her son the way that she does if she wasn't able to be there with him every day as she has been able to do for the last two years.  How precious it is that she is able to be there when Bella got home from school.
     Yes, while it's true that they were not able to go on that Disney vacation last summer, they managed to find the good times in their Staycations.  I suspect the memories from cooling off in their little backyard pool and the many bar-b-que get togethers with good friends will be long-lasting.

And is there anything better than a outing at the county park on a sunny spring day?

or a sneak away day at the beach?

Perhaps Disney next year.

Here is today's entry from Anna's Diary:
Thurs. March 14 1929
Went to Frances and from there we went to Mrs. Lombardys for dinner.  She has one of the most gorgeous homes I ever saw.  Lives in Maplewood.  Supper at 360. Home early with Baby and Rosalie.
Click here to see the post where I introduced Anna's Diary.

By the way, I did not genuflect.  (Ref. Yesterday's Post)


  1. Thanks for the tip. I will pass it on to my daughter.  

  2. I think what your grandchildren will remember is that their parents loved them and spent time with them.  I don't think they'll  remember that  they didn't get to go to Disneyland in 2011! 

  3. Staycations are great!  I would take a staycation over going to D-Land anytime!
    Having said that, I do completely agree with your comment about the gift of time.  I was fortunate enough to have been able to stay home full time with our children until the younger reached school age.  It was the most important job of my life and the one that mattered the most.  And, we scrimped and there were no vacations (well, I take that back, we went camping in the summer and that was wonderful).  But there was security, routine, and time.  I have never regretted that decision.
    btw, please tell your daughter that, in both my personal and professional experience, being the absolute best substitute teacher you can be is an outstanding way to open doors to full employment.  I can't count the number of times I have sat on a hiring panel and the  strong substitute who we know and have watched always has an edge in the process.

  4. I had gaps of staying at home for various reasons in between periods of working part or full-time when my kids were young. I have been steadily employed full-time since Daughter-Only was in kindergarten, though. And I definitely identify with exactly what you are saying--those periods where I could just be a constant presence with the kids and around the house were definitely precious luxuries.

    Regarding the genuflecting question from the last post: I think you definitely made the right choice. Your relationship with/to the church has changed. My non-Catholic sister spoke at the Catholic funeral services for a close friend's daughter and she did not genuflect, though the Catholic speakers, of course, all did.