Meditating Under Tall Pines

It's been recommended to me that I try meditation.

A "Guided Meditation" group meets once a week in our community center.  I agreed to go and give it a try.

There were about 20 of us in the group.  Most of us were women, but there were also three men.  They were there with their wives.

As I looked around the room, I noticed that one of the couples was having a disagreement about the placement of their chairs.

"Hmmm", I giggled to myself,  "I was under the impression that meditation was supposed to promote peace and tranquility."

Once everyone got settled, we started off the session with one member of the group leading us in a set of Tai Chi moves.

I liked the slowness and the repetition of the moves.  It was kind of hypnotic actually.  I had never done anything like that before.  I felt very relaxed afterwards.

After we finished with the Tai Chi, we sat on our chairs in a circle.

The leader began to guide us through a visualization.

As I sat there with my eyes closed, listening to the calm voice of the leader, I could feel myself entering into somewhat of a tranced state.

I pictured myself siting on a rocker on the front porch of a lakeside cabin.  I felt safe and protected by the tall pines which cocooned the area.   Rays of sun filtered through the trees and reflected on the calm water.

I then began to picture someone very dear to me sitting on the rocker next to me.  He turned to me and smiled.  He seemed so happy.   Suddenly, I started to experience a rush of emotion.

I managed to hold back tears, maintain my composure and finish the exercise.

As I was getting ready to leave, one of the woman came up to me and asked me if I enjoyed the meditation.

I told her what happened to me.   She explained that what happened to me was very normal.

I'm not sure I am ready to go back to the group yet.  I think that perhaps I should practice in private for awhile first.

Family Secrets Shh Don't Tell

I received a phone call late one night last week.   It was from a close family member who I shall call Harry.

Harry confided in me that he was going through a rough patch.

After I got off the phone with Harry, I was really bothered by what he was going through.  He was very upset and I felt so bad for him.   I listened and offered my support and yes perhaps a little motherly advice.

Now Harry didn't specifically tell me that I should not tell anyone else in the family about this, but knowing Harry I assumed that he wouldn't want me to.

Harry and I are very close and, as I said, I was upset for him.

Cathy is another close family member.  She and Harry are also very close.

So I thought it probably would be okay if I called Cathy to tell her what was going on.

But I did have to warn Cathy that she probably shouldn't let on to Harry that she knew what was going on.  I thought that it would be better if Harry told her himself.  Cathy agreed.

However, apparently, Harry didn't feel comfortable telling Cathy because so far he has not said a word to her about his situation.

Now I have to admit,  Harry has called me several times since with updates about what is going on.

Now I also have to admit, as soon as I get off the phone with Harry, I call Cathy to tell her the latest.

Two days ago Harry and Cathy were together for most of the day.  Cathy said that she and Harry had a nice day together, but that he never mentioned anything to her about his problem.

So the bottom line is, Harry doesn't know that Cathy knows what I know.

It is a common thing for this to happen in my family.
The conversation usually goes something like this:

"Hello?"
"Hi, you."
"Have you talked to so and so lately?"
"No, why what's going on?"
"No, I really shouldn't say anything."
"Oh come on now, you started saying something, you have to tell me now."
"Well so and so told me not to tell anyone.  If I tell you, you have to promise that you won't tell anyone."
"Of course, I won't.  I mean who am I going to tell?"

I have decided that the next time I talk to Harry I am going to tell him that Cathy knows.
It's too confusing to keep track of what Cathy is supposed to know or not know .
After all Cathy cares a great deal about Harry and I'm sure she wouldn't tell anyone else. :)




 

Domani Joseph - Happy Birthday

Today Anne took Joe to Memorial Sloan Kettering in NYC for a procedure.  He has a fluid build up around his lungs.  The procedure involved inserting a catheter in his chest to allow the fluid to drain.  They drained a liter out today.  There is still about a liter left.   With the catheter he will be able to drain the fluid out as needed.

It was a long day for everyone, especially Joe and Anne.
They left the house at 8:00 this morning and didn't get home until 7:00 this evening.

Joe seemed to be okay.    He looked tired.

Ross and I babysat for Domani.


Last year at this time we were visiting Anne and Joe at a different hospital.

Today is Domani Joseph's

 first birthday.   

When Anne and Joe got home, we had a little celebration with a birthday cupcake for Domani.

Domani means tomorrow in Italian.

I hope for many tomorrow's Joseph.

What a year it has been.