Evolve - The A to Z Challenge - The Letter E

Blogging from A to Z Challenge
April 2016
This month I will be participating in the “Blogging from A-Z Challenge” 
What is it?

Blogging every day.  It begins on April First with a topic themed on something with the letter A, then on April second another topic with the letter B as the theme, and so on until I finish on April thirtieth with the theme based on the letter Z.   The theme of the day is the letter scheduled for that day.

Evolve

In yesterday's post, I wrote about my reluctance to become socially involved in our community.
I suppose the word to describe my behavior might be snobbery.
I'm not normally that way, but I will admit to a smidge of ageism when we first moved into this active adult, age restricted neighborhood.
In the last few years, because of one too many of life's curve balls,  I felt my self-imposed isolation was necessarily justified.   It was hard to be out and about.
Anyway, I'm awfully shy which made it even harder for me to stir.
But about 18 months ago I was coaxed into attending a meeting of a group of people who came together once a week to grieve the loss of a loved one.  In the beginning, with the first few sessions,  we were individuals, each immersed in our own sadness.   Gradually we came together to become a unit of hope and support for each other.
At the end of the eight weeks, we promised to continue to meet once a month.  And we've kept that promise.
I believe that's when I started to evolve.
About nine months ago I joined a group of women who meet three times a week to grunt, bend, lift, dance and laugh, mostly at ourselves.  The first time I participated I felt awkward and out of step with the rest.  Afterward, I found out that most of the members of the group had been attending this aerobics class for the last fourteen years.  A couple of the women asked if I was new to the community.  When I told them that I had been living here for nearly 15 years, they laughed and asked me where I had been hiding.  I just smiled and shrugged my shoulders.
My new exercise routine has given me a burst of energy.
A few weeks ago I joined the Nimble Fingers group. These women meet once a week to knit, crochet and check in with each other.  They've been meeting for the last 15 years.  A couple of the women asked if I was new to the community.  They had the same reaction as my exercise buddies when I told them how long I have actually been here.
We are currently working on making baby blankets for the local Children's hospital which provides a purpose for me as well as lifting my spirits.
Then a few days ago I had a most unusual experience.   I had just come out of the house with our dog, Rico when he spotted his girlfriend Lucy.  Lucy and her "mom" were walking on the other side of the street.  I crossed over to say hello.   While Rico and Lucy expressed their affection for each other, my neighbor and I exchanged pleasantries, as we normally do.
Although we've been neighbors for about eight years, we never met until about nine months ago.  That's when she rescued Lucy and we began to run into each other when we walked the dogs.
We would let the dogs play for a short time while she and I would talk about the weather.  After a few minutes, we would both move on.
But, this other day, for some reason, our conversation about the weather went further than normal.  I happened to mention my blog.  She was quite interested and began to ask me about it.
That's when she told me that she also liked to write.
One thing led to another and we discovered other things that we had in common.
At one point we both became emotional, each of us waving our hands in front of our faces to fan away the tears.
Embarrassed, I admitted to her that I did not even know her name.
"I'm Sue," she said.
As I was about to say goodbye, she told me she would like to read my writings and we've since exchanged our offerings.
It's amazing what I've seen since I opened my eyes as I tiptoed into this community of awfully nice people.


After our meeting Sue and I have exchanged e-mails.  She sent the following piece to me.

March 30, 2016

I'm sitting here feeling sad

But then again I'm feeling glad

I know that made little sense

Maybe I can explain

Yesterday I met someone

I often see when walking my dog Lucy

This time we stopped and talked

As if it was just meant to be

What I find amazing

Is how often I meet certain people by chance

Only to find they have many of the same interests and life challenges

But for whatever reason we just walk by each other without even a glance

I find life can be strange in many a way

Where just a casual talk can help us find inner strength 

Just because two people stopped that particular day

I'm sitting here feeling sad

Now knowing that just stopping along the way

Really is not so bad 

I'm realizing walking on without a glance

Really takes away that chance

You might just end up feeling glad

That this day you stopped to talk along the way

So after all it does make sense why I am feeling sad and glad

All in the same day

The answer is so simple

It is because this time I did stop along the way

SEB2016

Divulge A to Z Challenge The Letter D

Blogging from A to Z Challenge
April 2016
This month I will be participating in the “Blogging from A-Z Challenge” 
What is it?

Blogging every day.  It begins on April First with a topic themed on something with the letter A, then on April second another topic with the letter B as the theme, and so on until I finish on April thirtieth with the theme based on the letter Z.   The theme of the day is the letter scheduled for that day.

Divulge
An Experience of Truth

Ross and I have lived in our community for 14 years.  It's one of those age-restricted ones.  When we  were contemplating buying here,  the salesperson, Lisa, was hard selling the "Lifestyle".
"There are so many activities," she said.
Continuing on with her sales pitch, she said,  "The people living here are so nice.  You'll make instant lifelong friends."
At the time, I was a skeptic and cynical.  I felt I was still young and these people were so old.  Now, when I think back to the arrogance of my attitude, I am embarrassed.
Anyway, 14 years ago, when Lisa mentioned "lifelong" friends, I remember thinking, they will be, at best, short-term lifelong friends.
This time of our life is much different than when we were twenty-something and newly married.  Actually, the biggest difference, I guess, is that Ross and I were each married to different people back then.
But, then, yes when I was young, "lifelong" meant a time so far in the future that it was an ungraspable concept.
Now, the foreseeable future is a certainty, evidenced by the number of new next door neighbors we have had in the last fourteen years.
So, now, I will divulge my secret for how I managed to cope with living here in this community of short term lifelong friends.
I didn't make friends.  In fact, I boasted about how I mostly kept to myself.  I smugly replied to those who asked, "Do you participate in any of the activities?"
"Oh, no, I am not a joiner," I would say.
Anyway, I had heard rumors about cliques and how hard it was to be accepted.  So why bother?  I thought.
In the last 14 years, life has certainly taken its toll.  Particularly the last 10 of those fourteen.  There have been many times I wished I had someone to confide in, to commiserate with over a cup of tea.
Perhaps because I am now one of "those" people, who I now empathically describe, not as old, but  wise, I regretfully understand that there can be no time constraints placed on the value of comradery and community.  
Recently,  I began to wonder if it is too late for me to join in.
I can now divulge another secret, I believe I am starting to evolve.
Yes, tomorrow's E word is Evolve.

“Constant” A to Z Challenge The Letter C

Blogging from A to Z Challenge
April 2016
This month I will be participating in the “Blogging from A-Z Challenge” 
What is it?

Blogging every day.  It begins on April First with a topic themed on something with the letter A, then on April second another topic with the letter B as the theme, and so on until I finish on April thirtieth with the theme based on the letter Z.   The theme of the day is the letter scheduled for that day.

This is a fictional piece.

Constant

Claire was curled up in a fetal position in the over stuffed chair in the corner of the bedroom.   Her legs and bare feet were pulled up under her.   Her head rested uncomfortably on the arm of the chair, both hands pressed against her cheek.
It was well passed midnight.  Except for the slivers of moonlight filtering through the blinds, the room was dark. The thermostat in the house was set to keep the temperature at 63 degrees at night.    It was cold.  Her body shivered under her thin nightgown.
She heard a rustling sound and a movement from the bed caught her eye.  She picked her head up to look, but soon realized it was only the shadows of the backyard pine branches swaying in the wind.
She stared at the bulk of his body under the covers, watching for signs of his breathing. She settled back down when she heard him cough.
He had carefully over all of their years, lulled and cradled her in his safety.
If she became impatient with him, he would smile at her and tell her it didn't matter, he still loved her.
"I'm not going anywhere," he would say.  And she believed him.  She believed in him.
She thought about how gradually in the last few years, he had begun to slow down.  One by one he lost interest in the things that he used to love, perhaps even her.
Yesterday, when he woke from his nap, he stared at her.  His eyes narrowed and he asked her who she was.
But tomorrow she knew he would look for her, frightened if she was out of the room for more than a few minutes.
She would smile and gently say,  "Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere."
She was stiff now from the uncomfortable position she had gotten into. Her head, neck and shoulders hurt.
Just like she had done every night for the last fifty-plus years,  she climbed into bed to nestle up next to him and grab onto his warmth.