Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Tales of a Surgery Virgin or My Hair Raising Visit to Dr. Frankenstein’s Lab

So it’s over and done with.  Yesterday, I had my first experience with a surgical procedure.   Of course in today’s world, a lengthy hospital stay is rare.  I was what they call an “in and out” patient or same day surgery.

Prior to surgery day, I was given plenty of advice.  Gems like “it’s no big deal’, “you’ll do fine”, and of course the proverbial “a friend of a friend of mine had that done and he/she ran a marathon two days after the surgery.”

The pre-op room was cheerfully decorated with colorful kites and umbrellas hanging from the ceilings.

Even though I didn’t have a private room, I did have my own cubicle with a privacy curtain.
Wrapped in cozy warm blankets, I was lulled into believing that I was actually at a spa for an afternoon of pampering. I must say, each member of the staff who took care of me went out of their way to be accommodating.

Oh yeah, it was all fun and hahaha’s with Ross telling me to smile and snapping my picture, as if he were filming a documentary.
I felt like a celebrity waving good-bye to him as they wheeled me out of the bright orange and blue room, down the hall and then “dun dun duuun” into Dr. Frankenstein’s Laboratory.
 I took in a quick panoramic view of the glaringly lit OR.  I wondered what the purpose of those leather straps on that gurney, that I had to “hop” onto, was.  I had visions of snapping rubber gloves, mysterious looking probes and gigantic syringes.

Of course I don’t remember much of anything once they strapped me down in.  The next thing I knew someone was talking to me.  “Lynda, you’re all done.”   My response, which I managed to croak out, was “PAIN”.

The rest of my brief hospital visit is pretty much a blur.  I do remember being pumped up with a lot anti-nausea and pain meds.  I was also extremely thirsty, and quite hoarse.  When I tried to move it hurt…a lot!

Yes, relatively speaking, and compared to what I have seen many of my loved ones have to endure, my surgery was minor.

However, for this first timer, it was a big deal.
Even though I probably would never have attempted a marathon anyway, I can proudly say that today, 24 hours later, I can make it to the bathroom without help.  

I remember my mother telling me that when I was born, lots of years ago, she was in the hospital for one week.  After two days, they let her dangle her feet over the side of the bed.

In my opinion, after yesterday’s experience, I have to say, that once I was out of the “recovery” area and back into my little cubicle, the only thing I wanted to do was get home and into my own bed.

I know that all of those well meaning folks who told me that my gall bladder surgery was a going to be “piece of cake” just wanted to make sure that prior to the operation, I didn’t worry incessantly,

And yeah, I would have.

But, I don’t know, I kind of think surprises are far better when balloons and cakes are involved.

Don’t you?

Gotta get some rest now.


  1. Hope you get back in tip top shape soon. Take care.

  2. Glad it went well -- as I believe you have deduced, I avoid doctors/hospitals like the plague. But I still get stuck there anyway..... I am all about getting the heck out of there asap. I have been well cared for in my experiences at "in and out" surgery in the past few years but I am as eager as possible to get the heck out of there. Would much rather be at home recovering than in a hospital. I will say that the caregivers have been understanding and aware of my apprehensions and pain. I appreciate that.

    1. I know this is supremely absurd, well maybe not, but the thing that freaks me out the most is that a part of my body was removed. I guess that’s the Frankenstein complex.

      So does that mean I am not the same person I was two days ago? :)

      I hope you’re re-coop is coming along.

  3. Cute post with the Frankenstein angle. Hope you feel better soon. I've not seen such a cutely decorated surgical area before.